Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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