we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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