4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize