I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Your cock deserves a montage
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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