I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
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I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
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Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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