Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize