i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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