WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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