my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
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