I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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