Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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