So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize