Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
We had sex on a dog bed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize