every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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