Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants