He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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