im so drunk with asians
where?
always
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
i now understand why vodka
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize