All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Someone shattered a urinal.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
