Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
