Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
So many bounce houses so little time
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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