are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
