In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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