do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
