I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
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