Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
