I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize