Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Best friends brother. Beat that.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
