All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
