I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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