no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize