Having a random hookup so left but love u
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize