We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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