I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
