Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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