check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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