If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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