in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
