can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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