My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
