K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
