Christians are straight up FREAKS
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
