i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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