the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
