the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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