No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
