If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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