He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
