i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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