I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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