she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
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I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't judge my taste in strippers
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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