is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm both gender and math confused
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
