We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
