really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
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